Lost Things...

I know, I know, I was going to try and write something exciting and wonderful and happy, I may be able to get there from this sad title and experience. Today, Dave and I, decided that we have to lose some weight. This is only the beginning of something that will be lost in a good way. So we decided to go for a walk. We left the house at 7:30AM and took Koda (our 7 year old Lab) out into the cool morning air for a walk around the neighborhood. We got back to our house, and we saw one of Dave's favorite basketball players from when he was coaching basketball at Manteca High. Matt is a wonderful young man. He is 20 years old and in the last 3 years has seen his parents get divorced, loose their home, and his dad has lost his health. Matt got out of his car and chatted with us for awhile. Right before he pulled up I saw some garbage on our side yard next to the street. I picked up this envelope and I could not believe it.

On Thursday, I found it odd that I had no mail in my mail box. I went to Costco after yard duty and did not return until right before 3PM and rushed off to get the kids from school. Well, I wondered where the mail was, but noticed at 4:30 when I took Lizzie to Soccer that the neighbor had mail. So I just found it odd to have no mail, but in my gut thinking something was not right. Sort of like Miss Clevell in Madeline.

Well, this envelope that I found was in fact addressed to the Burila Family. It was an envelope with the return address of my sister's son who is serving his mission in the Ohio Columbus Mission, for The Church of Jesus Christ Of Latter-Day Saints. But sadly, the envelope was empty. No letter, or pictures, or fun wonderful words that we have been waiting more than a month to hear. Lost. Gone. Sad.

I went to the Relief Society Broadcast tonight. I was late because Steve's football game went into triple overtime and his team won, but I couldn't leave until I was sure that they had won. It was a fun game to watch because he played almost every offensive play. He is growing into a wonderful young man. However, there are days when I wish I could make him into a "lost boy" and preserve him as a boy, instead of having to watch him grow up and have to face things I can't shield him from. Lost ability to protect a child from everything under the sun is a little hard to let go, and hope that we are, and have done, our best to help him make good choices when we can't make all of his choices for him anymore. I love my sons and daughter.

Lost Friend, anyone who knows Filipinos knows that they are related to every other Filipino on the planet. So Dave's family has a close circle of friends that have grown up together, a sweet "cousin" has passed away at age 42, leaving behind four kids and her husband. Cancer. Cancer that was found because she went to the doctor after she lost her job. It is very sad when your parents pass away and the generation of people you thought would always be there are passing on, but when the loss is someone that you played with as a child, you can only imagine the loss for her children, and husband.

Okay, my last thing in this sad lost blog. I went to The Relief Society Broadcast. This in and of itself is not sad. But I started thinking about all the relationships that have been changed for me in the last four months. I am trying everyday not to be sad for the things I feel I have lost, but tonight, I could not help but miss my friends in Stansbury. I went to the Broadcast with them within the first week of my moving into the neighborhood. I just miss seeing them everyday. I miss talking to them about things. I miss going out my front door and having instant friends. These friendships per say are not lost but just altered. I can't hear Jenn yelling out her intercom. I can't see Susan walking with the girls. I can't have Paisley running to love my dog in the garage. I can't see Michelle's big wreath from my bedroom window (it might not be up yet, but it will be soon). I miss having the Bishop just stop on by and saying hello while out for a bike ride. Will it take me 3 years to get over this loss? I hope not.

So the bright side, the sun will come up tomorrow. It will probably be hot again. I will find away to stop thinking of myself and find a place to channel all the negative, sad feelings, into something joyful and happy. Eventually we will get another letter from our Missionary Nephew. Eventually, we are going to see the hand of the Lord in all this craziness that is our lives right now, and peace will find its way back to us, (or maybe its just me) I hope it is soon. I want to lose one more thing and that is this sad attitude.